July 3, 2010

Nancy figured out

From Gerard at American Digest:
I think I've got the Pelosi Perplex puzzled out
When Nancy Pelosi speaks, America is gobstoppered.
Like you and millions of others, when I read Pelosi's theory that unemployment is the best means of creating employment (Pelosi: Unemployment Checks Fastest Way to Create Jobs), I had to spend a couple of days in the auto repair shop have my jaw jacked back into place.

Back at home with my head wrapped in bandages, I then read her amplification of those remarks: "It injects demand into the economy. It creates jobs faster than almost any other initiative you can name...." There was the tearing of fabric and...

Well, I had to turn around and get back to the shop to have my jaw jacked back into place again. Clearly, this process cannot continue. Being neither a rich man nor on unemployment, I cannot continue to pay for Pelosi's ceaseless injections of demand into the "Just STFU!" sector of the economy.

How does the mouth of this woman keep moving so many years after her intellectual hysterectomy? She's obviously in dire need of a high hard one in the form of a meteor to the base of the skull, and yet, like the Energizer Zombie, she keeps talking and talking and .... Then it hit me.

It was obvious. In fact, Pelosi herself hints at it when she says, "It injects demand into the economy." Pelosi's the victim of a ghastly surgical error. Nancy Pelosi's problem stems from the fact that at one of her regular Mojitos, Full Brazilian Waxing and Bathtub Botox" parties on her official jet, one of her fellow drunken galpals plunged the Botox needle through Pelosi's cheek and into her brain stem before pressing the plunger home.

You think I am exaggerating or make the weak joke, compadre? Not at all.

As it turns out there is a surgical procedure tailor-made for delivering Botox into Pelosi's brain. It's called: A non-surgical technique for accurate intracerebral injections in rat
An improved technique for intracerebral injection into rats is described. This technique uses a metallic skull template as an injection aid, aligned with the maxillary incisors, the eyes and the outer ear canals of anesthesized animals. With this device we have been able to target brain structures as small as 4 mm3 both rapidly, accurately and reproducibly. The new method provides a useful alternative to common stereotaxic techniques for rats up to 300 g. -- Journal of Neuroscience Methods
I rest my case.
This best describes the problem -- I defy anyone to come up with a better answer... Posted by DaveH at July 3, 2010 12:03 PM